Saturday, August 25, 2007

"suspiciously left-wing"

Ah, the Telegram and Gazette is truly the gift that keeps on giving. Today's tour de force comes from a Paxton man's letter to the editor, who believes the federal government is an un-American, suspiciously left-wing organization:
It distressed me greatly to read that life expectancy in the United States is in 42nd place worldwide and behind such countries as Jordan, Guam and the Cayman Islands...[and] that we are 41st in infant survival rates behind the likes of Cuba, Taiwan and most of Europe....

Whence came this malicious report? I would hope that our hometown newspaper would not publish such un-American drivel, especially when it comes from such suspiciously, left-wing organizations as the U.S. Census Bureau and the National Center for Health Statistics.
And while the writer has the bully pulpit, he might as well toss in a completely unrelated truth:
Most of us know that ...the only reason that dinosaurs are no longer running about is that they were too big to fit onto Noah’s Ark.
I wonder if the U.S. Census Bureau keeps numbers on how many Paxton residents are loony tunes.

Previous T&G Letters to the Editor:
"T&G Readers are off their meds again"
"I like Jasmine Guy"
BREAKING: Election fraud in Auburn
"The sting of unboozed Democrats"
"Why is Mitt Romney ashamed of Massachusetts?"
"hot condiments cause them to be...interested in sex"
Disgust with that nasty Francona grows
It's that dirty Francona's fault
T&G reader takes on terrorism
Worcester: the San Diego of the East
Is State Senator Barrios a Bush Crony
Rem-Dawg Debate Rages in Worcester
Jerry Remy has "lost all touch with reality"

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